Saturday, May 23, 2009

Of Boys And Food

Ever get to the end of a week and feel kind of bushwhacked? I didn't think so. Julie spent the week in Arizona with her youngest sister, brother-in-law and three kids. She suffered through 100-degree days and coped by spending time in the swimming pool in the back yard. She probably needs a nice relaxing time at the spa to unwind. I'll look into that for her. She did say that Olivia was an absolute monster on the flight home. I don't believe her. Olivia is too sweet to be a monster. (Editor's note: Really? I wonder what your story will be when you're driving across the country with her. Author's reply: Thanks for mentioning that. I'll be picking up the earplugs tomorrow.)

Things went remarkably smooth here, though it's not to say I wasn't a little wigged out at times. Or frazzled even. I'm happy to report we made no visits to the emergency care center, we weren't compelled to make trips to McDonald's at dinner and near as I can tell, everyone is alive and accounted for right down to Ezra. Claire is a huge help and Brenton, Taylor and Ethan pulled some serious weight helping out around the house. Kudos as well to Evie and MerriGrace. Tonight a couple friends of Taylor and Ethan are here so we have, well, 14 kids in the house if my math is correct. I expect the fire marshal to arrive at any moment with news we've exceeded the allowed occupancy for this pad. The boys just got back from Brenton taking them to the grocery store. By all appearances, it seems as though they cleaned out the "Chips" aisle. They also have pizza rolls, chicken quesadillas and mozzarella sticks. I think those are all appetizers. Hopefully we have enough grub in the house for the main course. Or courses. I remember being a teenage boy. I was always hungry. I could eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I remember sometimes having a breakfast of eggs and pancakes at my house with my buddy Darren Petrie, then we would ride our bikes a mile to my buddy Schwartz's casa just so we could have Lucky Charms and Trix. Sadly, those days are long over. Breakfast these days is yogurt and an apple. The mere thought of Trix or Lucky Charms results in immediate, instantaneous even, weight gain and makes my next attempt at running all the more difficult.

With all these starved teenage boys here, I have this image of waking up in the morning and wading through bags of empty bags of chips, piles of discarded pizza roll, quesadilla and mozzarella sticks boxes, crumbs from sub sandwiches and probably foil from dozens of Ding Dongs. But it will bring back some sweet memories.


  1. How about those trips to Costco (w/ the big flatbed cart piled high) and Winco(full grocery carts) Only to have them eat a quarter of it on the way home out the back of the Suburban(just snacking) then eat another quarter of it while carrying it into the house. Kari and I are putting things away and can't find half of the food...oops!!

  2. Clearly Bob, there's only one thing to do in a situation like this. Buy more food. I've been around hungry teenagers. It's not pretty. Especially at mealtime when there's been no food in the house for "appetizer" purposes. You get to dinner and reach across the table for some gravy and you're liable to end up with a fork in your arm.

  3. Yah Matt, sometimes I feel like I'm living in the Kung Fu Panda movie and I have 6 little Po's in my kitchen snacking on monkeys cookies> (you'll have to watch the movie to remember that part)